


Skylark

by nombre_appelido



Category: Original Work
Genre: BDSM, Bad BDSM Etiquette, F/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, Sexual Assault, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:48:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22885051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nombre_appelido/pseuds/nombre_appelido
Summary: pretty shit at summaries sorrythis story is dark and deals with potentially triggering material. if you are an sa survivor, i beg you to be careful and read with great caution. or skip it. your mental health must come first.
Comments: 9
Kudos: 2





	Skylark

**Author's Note:**

> again, this story could be potentially triggering to sa survivors. please read with caution.

say the fucking word. say it. say it.  
i couldn't.  
i didn't know why.  
too much, too much, too much-  
i needed to say the word.  
he'd stop in a moment, right? gather me up and hug me and apologize for going too far. he was a good man.  
or he wouldn't.

i never could tell, in this state. too much trauma. too many times where i screamed and nothing was done. they just...kept going.  
or maybe it was pride. i wanted to take it all and keep silent like i always had. to admit that it was too far was to be vulnerable, to admit that i had limits. i didn't know how to do that.

it was too far.  
he'd finish, and then i could go home. i felt sorry for him. he wouldn't understand why i'd run away and not be able to face him for days at a time. eventually, he'd put it together. it'd be too late then.  
it already was.

one final push, and he was finished. i remained utterly still until i was untied, the blindfold removed. he smiled dopily and stroked my hair.  
if he touched me again, i might throw up. 

i went to the bathroom with my things. had a piss, got dressed. and then i ran from his house. sleepily he called, "hey! where you goin'?"  
i did not respond. 

into my car and away.  
when i got home, i broke down in tears. he was calling me frantically, apologizing, asking what had happened, what the fuck baby is everything okay--  
i blocked his number.  
i'd unblock it, in a few days. i'd go over, explain there had been an emergency and i couldn't afford the sweet distraction his lovely face offered.  
i'd sooner die than be vulnerable, admit that he had gone too far and i had been too broken to say so. one fucking word.  
skylark.

**Author's Note:**

> well, tell me what you think  
> it's pretty dark i know
> 
> i'm not particularly informed on the bdsm community. i don't know much about it. this story was simply the brainchild of some dark musings. if you do know what you're doing and i have misrepresented anything, from the bdsm to the ptsd to the ettiquette, please don't hesitate to tell me.
> 
> although the sub blames herself for the abuse she's suffered, none of it was her fault. it is not your fault either. you haven't done anything. if anyone comes onto this story and thinks i am justifying what happened to this woman, leave immediately. you are not welcome here.


End file.
